Caveman Contest: Personalized Golf Balls

I’ve been lookin’ fer some more golf balls recently as I’ve been sinking more into the water than the hole. You just have to fight geese for yer ball, Ol’ Scratch here fights plesiosaurs. Hittin’ it into the bushes isn’t any better. There aren’t rabbits on my course; there are R.O.U.S.’s sneakin’ up on me. Even if I do get one on the fairway, Neanderthals keep mistakin’ my ball for theirs. That’s when I have to use my clubs as…well…clubs. So long story short, I need more golf balls. I’ve been thinkin’ this time I’m gettin’ personalized ones this time. That usually can be expensive, but my favorite site is havin’ a sale this week. Wonder what my new balls should say….

Personalized Balls Sale
Here's a few dozen lined up & ready for personalizing

Funny Personalized Golf Balls One-Liners

Pick it up

Return to sender

Don’t even think about it

NOT YOUR BALL

Fore?

Marco?!

Beyond here be dragons

MIA

Warning: I can’t swim

The hole is my home!

 

Personalized Golf Ball Gift Ideas

  • Golf Ball Par-scription

A set of golf balls can be included in a prescription bottle with a personalized label detailing the name and dosage. You can include as a dosage anything from “play once a day,” “take with beer” or “take daily to relieve stress.” The label can further be decorated to mimic a prescription bottle, with things such as a pharmacy name, a doctor (possibly use a famous golfer’s name) and warning labels. On each golf ball, a name can also be printed.

  • Personalizing Camouflage Golf Balls

A popular joke is that camouflage will render anything invisible, so when golf balls go missing after a bad swing some golfers might feel the golf ball was camouflaged. Camouflage balls can actually be purchased and personalized with a golf ball stamp or even a permanent marker. These balls could be accompanied with a note with a humorous saying such as: “Now you have an excuse for not being able to find your balls.”

 

CONTEST!


Got a great one-liner you’d put on a golf ball? Leave it as a comment on this blog and you’ll automatically be enterin’ my Funniest Personalized Golf Ball Contest! Simply submit a funny 3-line or less imprint for a personalized golf ball as a comment here before Midnight ET on Wednesday, 8/8. My caveman crew’ll select the best of the bunch and put it up to a vote on my Facebook page, with the winner gettin’ $25 in Caveman Cash!

*****Edited 8/9 ******

Thanks for all your entries; the contest is now closed. The winner will be posted on Friday.

 
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121 thoughts on “Caveman Contest: Personalized Golf Balls

  • August 6, 2012 at 9:40 am
    Permalink

    You think I look bad, you should see the other guy!

    Reply
  • August 6, 2012 at 9:43 am
    Permalink

    “Can you help me find the fairway?”

    Reply
  • August 6, 2012 at 9:44 am
    Permalink

    Like my dimples?

    Reply
  • August 6, 2012 at 9:46 am
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    I didn’t want this ball anyway
    You can have it.

    Reply
  • August 6, 2012 at 9:55 am
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    HELLO?? Anyone there?

    Reply
  • August 6, 2012 at 10:04 am
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    this ball belongs to
    (un)Lucky Jim

    Reply
  • August 6, 2012 at 10:16 am
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    It felt like a good swing.

    Reply
  • August 6, 2012 at 10:23 am
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    Open for adoption

    Reply
  • August 6, 2012 at 12:08 pm
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    I’m too good for my home

    Reply
  • August 6, 2012 at 12:33 pm
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    Gambling is illegal at Bushwood, sir.
    And I NEVER slice.

    Reply
  • August 6, 2012 at 1:21 pm
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    Beach Bum OR Left for dead.

    Reply
  • August 6, 2012 at 3:09 pm
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    Propert of fairway
    Please return ASAP

    Reply
  • August 6, 2012 at 3:14 pm
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    See the ball
    Now see your nagging wife
    Now hit the ball!!

    Reply
  • August 6, 2012 at 6:06 pm
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    Will you treat me better than the previous owner?

    Reply
  • August 7, 2012 at 7:58 am
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    Oh, yeah… FORE!

    Reply
  • August 7, 2012 at 8:00 am
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    If found..return to hole!

    Reply
  • August 7, 2012 at 8:00 am
    Permalink

    If found, call my
    lawyer; he’s
    expecting you. Sry

    Reply
  • August 7, 2012 at 8:05 am
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    My balls are dimpled…

    Reply
  • August 7, 2012 at 8:07 am
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    Found: One of my excuses.
    I will be telling my co workers
    how I almost had the perfect game.

    Reply
  • August 7, 2012 at 8:08 am
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    Don’t ever leave me because I will find you!

    Reply
  • August 7, 2012 at 8:08 am
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    I like it rough 😉
    Hit me.

    Reply
  • August 7, 2012 at 8:08 am
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    Titanic was nothing compared to me!

    Reply
  • August 7, 2012 at 8:19 am
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    Oh look at all the fishes!

    Reply
  • August 7, 2012 at 8:27 am
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    This ball was
    in my anus
    wash your hands

    Reply
  • August 7, 2012 at 8:42 am
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    Birdie Hunter
    John 3:16

    Reply
  • August 7, 2012 at 8:43 am
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    If you found this
    you must need
    lessons too!

    Reply
  • August 7, 2012 at 8:46 am
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    I see your just as bad as my previous owner!

    Reply
  • August 7, 2012 at 8:47 am
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    Thou shall not touch other men’s balls! -Moses

    Reply
  • August 7, 2012 at 8:50 am
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    Talking to me won’t
    Help. Unless it’s
    Your opponents turn.

    Reply
  • August 7, 2012 at 8:58 am
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    If found, you’re swimming in the hazard.

    Reply
  • August 7, 2012 at 9:01 am
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    This was my “practice shot”

    Reply
  • August 7, 2012 at 9:02 am
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    Tiger’s Former Mistress

    Reply
  • August 7, 2012 at 9:06 am
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    Oops…that’s not the one I wanted

    Reply
  • August 7, 2012 at 9:14 am
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    Shhhhh…I’m hiding on Studa

    Reply
  • August 7, 2012 at 9:14 am
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    Shoulda went fishing…

    Reply
  • August 7, 2012 at 9:15 am
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    If you’re gonna play with my balls, you should at least buy me a beer first.

    Reply
  • August 7, 2012 at 9:18 am
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    Lost Ball Return To:
    Me @ 1-800-Free-Ball
    Reward Free Mulligans

    Reply
  • August 7, 2012 at 9:45 am
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    KISS
    Keep. It.
    Simple. Stupid.

    Reply
  • August 7, 2012 at 9:45 am
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    “Yeah I hit a tee SO WHAT!”

    Reply
  • August 7, 2012 at 9:45 am
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    “yeah I hit tree SO WHAT”

    Reply
  • August 7, 2012 at 9:49 am
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    Shoulda played from the forward tees

    Reply
  • August 7, 2012 at 9:51 am
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    I’m not lost… just taking the scenic route

    Reply
  • August 7, 2012 at 10:51 am
    Permalink

    My Ball Sinks
    When it hits
    ROCK BOTTOM

    Reply
  • August 7, 2012 at 11:26 am
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    I usually hit a fade

    Reply
  • August 7, 2012 at 11:34 am
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    Sorry, but the wind took it.

    Reply
  • August 7, 2012 at 11:40 am
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    Don’t look at me!!!

    Reply
  • August 7, 2012 at 11:47 am
    Permalink

    Not the kind of
    Birdie I was
    looking for

    Reply
  • August 7, 2012 at 11:57 am
    Permalink

    I’m an egg not a ball

    Reply
  • August 7, 2012 at 12:05 pm
    Permalink

    Purchased from Rock Bottom Golf
    Don’t worry, at their prices, you
    Know I have a lot more to lose!

    Reply
  • August 7, 2012 at 12:06 pm
    Permalink

    The one who finds
    The most of my lost balls
    WINS!

    Reply
  • August 7, 2012 at 12:14 pm
    Permalink

    Never up, never in!
    That’s what she said!

    Reply
  • August 7, 2012 at 12:35 pm
    Permalink

    Hole’s that way chief
    <——-

    Reply
  • August 7, 2012 at 12:50 pm
    Permalink

    WANTED!! ASAP!!
    Golf Lessons w/Experience
    Reward Free Ball From Me.

    Reply
  • August 7, 2012 at 12:53 pm
    Permalink

    This stinks I paid
    $50 for dozens of these
    And I lost everyone.

    Reply
  • August 7, 2012 at 1:52 pm
    Permalink

    Nike
    Just Hook It!

    Reply
  • August 7, 2012 at 3:10 pm
    Permalink

    hello new guy!
    hopefully this one
    wears underwear

    Reply
  • August 7, 2012 at 3:33 pm
    Permalink

    Please drop in hole

    Reply
  • August 7, 2012 at 4:40 pm
    Permalink

    your’e way out here too?
    u suck like my last owner

    Reply
  • August 7, 2012 at 5:27 pm
    Permalink

    Look Out Trees…
    Here I Come!

    Reply
  • August 7, 2012 at 5:27 pm
    Permalink

    Help!!!
    I Can’t Swim!

    Reply
  • August 7, 2012 at 6:47 pm
    Permalink

    Can you please
    grab my BALLZ
    for me sir?

    Reply
  • August 7, 2012 at 6:48 pm
    Permalink

    You touch…
    MY BALL!…
    YOUR SWIMMING!

    Reply
  • August 7, 2012 at 6:49 pm
    Permalink

    You think I lost a lot of balls today….you should have seen the Eagles play football….go Raiders….

    Reply
  • August 7, 2012 at 6:56 pm
    Permalink

    You know you have a problem when you go to the swapmeet and see all of your embroidered balls being sold for 25 cents each.

    Reply
  • August 7, 2012 at 6:58 pm
    Permalink

    You know you have a bigger problem when you see your driver that landed in the water being sold next to the 25 cent golf balls…

    Reply
  • August 7, 2012 at 7:04 pm
    Permalink

    GOLF..BEER..WOMEN..
    yes dear your the women…

    Reply
  • August 7, 2012 at 7:45 pm
    Permalink

    Wish this was Nascar Then I could turn left!

    Reply
  • August 7, 2012 at 10:07 pm
    Permalink

    Take a Lesson!

    Reply
  • August 7, 2012 at 10:30 pm
    Permalink

    In Da’ Woods, not Tiger’s either.

    Reply
  • August 7, 2012 at 10:32 pm
    Permalink

    My balls stink!

    Reply
  • August 8, 2012 at 1:50 am
    Permalink

    Beating you kid…
    At golf… Priceless

    Reply
  • August 8, 2012 at 1:54 am
    Permalink

    Beating your kid..
    At golf….priceless

    Reply
  • August 8, 2012 at 2:01 am
    Permalink

    Dear, Mr. Cheap Ass
    Find your own ball…

    Reply
  • August 8, 2012 at 2:42 am
    Permalink

    So much for 59!!!

    Reply
  • August 8, 2012 at 2:44 am
    Permalink

    Told you I could find it!

    Reply
  • August 8, 2012 at 8:12 am
    Permalink

    You have one ball.
    Now you know how
    Lance Armstrong feels!

    Reply
  • August 8, 2012 at 9:14 am
    Permalink

    Does this ProV1 look
    Like your Pink Flying Lady?

    Reply
  • August 8, 2012 at 10:32 am
    Permalink

    Get away, this is not your ball!!
    Your’s is in the thick stuff.

    Reply
  • August 8, 2012 at 10:34 am
    Permalink

    I found one one time that was personalized “Oh Shit!” Can’t bring myself to hit it. I keep it in my bag for a good chuckle on a bad round!

    Reply
  • August 8, 2012 at 10:43 am
    Permalink

    Who, me? No, I’m the Provisional!!!!

    Reply
  • August 8, 2012 at 10:46 am
    Permalink

    Does this make me look fat?

    Reply
  • August 8, 2012 at 10:52 am
    Permalink

    Gunga Galunga…

    Reply
  • August 8, 2012 at 10:53 am
    Permalink

    Hiding from Mrs.Titleist

    Reply
  • August 8, 2012 at 11:00 am
    Permalink

    total consciousness

    Reply
  • August 8, 2012 at 11:05 am
    Permalink

    …the Cinderella story, out of nowhere…

    Reply
  • August 8, 2012 at 11:30 am
    Permalink

    I don’t listen so you may as well throw me back where you found me.

    Reply
  • August 8, 2012 at 11:46 am
    Permalink

    Put it in the hole…..
    thats what she said

    Reply
  • August 8, 2012 at 12:39 pm
    Permalink

    KISS MY BALLS

    Reply
  • August 8, 2012 at 1:14 pm
    Permalink

    Ahh.. Another round trip vacation.

    Reply
  • August 8, 2012 at 1:48 pm
    Permalink

    Just TAAAPP it in!

    Reply
  • August 8, 2012 at 2:11 pm
    Permalink

    “Throw me that way <-"

    Reply
  • August 8, 2012 at 2:32 pm
    Permalink

    Guess what my handicap is – My Swing!

    Reply
  • August 8, 2012 at 4:02 pm
    Permalink

    Return me to the
    beverage cart
    for a free drink!

    Reply
  • August 8, 2012 at 5:15 pm
    Permalink

    “It’s you, not me”

    as in, its your swing not the ball.

    Reply
  • August 8, 2012 at 5:35 pm
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    “Yeah it really went that far”

    Reply
  • August 8, 2012 at 6:20 pm
    Permalink

    Buy balls..
    Lose balls..
    Circle of Golf..

    Reply
  • August 8, 2012 at 9:42 pm
    Permalink

    If you find this ball
    Keep it!!
    It wasn’t my day

    Reply
  • August 8, 2012 at 10:24 pm
    Permalink

    HAPPY LOOK OUT!!!

    Reply
  • September 7, 2012 at 9:47 am
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    love this article, I hope you’ll submit more appeal articles such as this! book marked for future reference! =)

    Reply
  • September 15, 2012 at 9:48 am
    Permalink

    love the content, I hope you are going to post more quality posts like this! bookmarked for future reference! =)

    Reply
  • March 20, 2016 at 6:26 pm
    Permalink

    I’ve had a bad stroke
    This will cost me money.
    Putt me back

    Reply

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